At some point yesterday, I wondered if I had climbed a mountain – my feet were tired, my muscles ached, I was tired from head to toe. Yes, I had climbed a mountain. Today, I have spent time remembering what led to the climb. Here are some snapshots from my memories…

It was some time in 1998 – we were returning from a church leadership conference, Bill Hybles was speaking – Ron asked that scary question, “Did God say anything to you tonight?” I wanted to answer, but I wanted to hear from him first, “Yeah, but what did he say to you?” He wouldn’t go, I wouldn’t go, finally we both said, “God told me that one of these days, we’re going to start one of those churches that becomes the ‘Hope of the World’.” Looking at each other with bewilderment, we had no idea what that meant or when that time would come. Together we shared ideas of what that would look like – a church beyond walls, in the community, uniting people in generosity, sharing the extravagant love of God.

Flash forward to October 2006 – we were standing on a mountain in the Eastern Sierra – a beautiful place, full of majesty and splendor, focusing on the awesome creation of God. I looked at Ron and said, “God’s about to do something different with us, isn’t He.” We both knew – we just had no idea what ‘it’ was. Standing on the top of that mountain we knew there was a bigger one ahead of us – one we would climb – one we would probably have no trail map for –one that would require big steps out of our little feet.

Flash forward to August 2007 – we were again on top of a hill somewhere in TN that we had never heard of, somewhere that we never thought we would be – getting ready to go through the ringer at the Church Planting Assessment Center. Could this be the time that God had forecast so many years ago? Were we ready for this mountain? A resounding yes – in the form of affirmation from so many, including those who head CPAC. Only one question remained, “where?”

Flash forward to January 2008 – a moving van makes its way south along the I-95 corridor from PA to Northern Virginia. A place not known, A people not familiar with, A mountain with no map, A job with no income…

Who knew that the next 20 months would involve so many big steps – in raising funds, in building relationships, in establishing credibility, in unleashing generosity. Who knew that time could move so quickly.

October 25, 2009 Restore Community Church held the Grand Opening Celebration for Sunday Morning Services. And yet, the Church began long before that. And while most people see Church as this Sunday Morning thing, Restore is so much more – lived out daily in the community, as one person invests in another, as generosity is extended, as the extravagant love of Jesus is shared. Something tells me that the biggest steps are yet to be taken.

Happy 13^th Anniversary!

August 5, 1995 – in less than 1hour from Miss to Mrs.

August 5, 2008 – not just Mrs., but so much more
Lover, partner, parent, friend

I am blessed by you Ron -

A stimulant to my thoughts

A spur to my fears

A champion of my gifts

A lover of my soul

My ever devoted love – yesterday, today, forever.

Pray for the peace of Jerusalem: “May those who love you be secure. May there be peace within your walls and security within your citadels.” For the sake of my brothers and friends, I will say, “Peace be within you.” For the sake of the house of the LORD our God, I will seek your prosperity.

As we prepare for a transition in the next several weeks, that brings us out of our church planting residency at New Life Christian Church and into a full blown needs assessment for a Community Service Organization, these words have become part of my daily prayer life.  Today, as I drove through our target city, I found myself asking God to bring his peace and prosperity to this new CSO and Church plant, that those within the borders would know peace and feel the peace that comes from relationship with Jesus Christ.

I read this quote by Oswald Chambers yesterday and realized it’s where I am today. Hope it encourages you as it has me.

“Faith never knows where it is being led, But it knows and loves the One who is leading.”

I have been going through a Beth Moore study, “Stepping Up: a journey through the Psalms of Ascent“. It’s really been shaping my prayer life right now and challenging my views on how God has intervened in my life.

Today, I began the study on Psalm 124 – it is fascinating me in new ways. I have never seen myself as one who has faced strong persecution/trials/attack. (I may be opening a can of worms for myself, having said that – pray for my protection.) I know that a battle wages around me and has the potential of being damaging – I’ve just never felt it to be severe.

Today, I realized that severity of attack depends on the person and situation. For me the attacks of my past have been a lack of faith – faith to step into God’s calling without releasing control to Him. This has limited my perspective on just what God can and will do so that I can see Him show up and experience the joy of obedience. Other attacks have been a lack of confidence in “my story” and ability to use it in the life of others. This has limited my perspective on God’s heart that breaks for those far from Him. It has also limited that boldness with which I have reached out to those far from Him.

I’ve always feared “spiritual” attack – I’ve feared as the Psalmist remarks being “swallowed alive, engulfed, and ripped apart.” But, I’ve never looked at it from the deliverance side “we have escaped, He didn’t abandon us, we’ve flown free, their grip is broken.” Psalm 124:8 reminds me that “God’s strong name is our help, the same God who made heaven and earth.” God does not overlook the attacks on His children, in fact He takes them very personally. Check out Zechariah 2:8!

Four months ago now, our family left Pennsylvania for Northern Virginia. Leading up to our move I prayed intensely for my sanity, for God’s provision in housing, for my kids to transition well. I worried a lot – about selling our home, packing our stuff, moving our stuff, storing our stuff, finding a good deal on a rental, saying “Goodbye”, saying “Hello”, my kids, our finances. Then I started praying through various Psalms, the more I prayed the less I worried, the less I worried the more I prayed. Finally – PEACE!

I never prayed for peace specifically but it came – it came as I gave each worry over to God.

We don’t know where we will be tomorrow – literally – we don’t know when the home we are renting will sell and we will have to move out, we don’t know where we will be planting a new church , we don’t have all the details of our fund-raising wrapped up yet, we are still living out of boxes. Funny thing about all this, I can not remember another season of life, since becoming an adult, quite as peaceful. Life today is a season of peace – beginning each day, as I pray through what could worry me, as I let go of the control to “know” in the moment, as I sit and enjoy the moments with my children, even as I shuffle through boxes still trying to find that elusive Lego that will make all the others fit together.

Peace

My 4 year old son, Ryan, has recently taken up residence inside my journal. His name and other self-scripted words are appearing in various forms, on various pages as I thumb through looking for space to write. Each time I come across these marks of his penmanship I smile (okay – the first time I was actually slightly irritated), and remember him. I remember his joy at discovering he can form letters and make words. I have also found myself pausing and reflecting on his proximity to my – not just because we are in the same house – often times that is not the case – but because my 4 year old is with me in those moments, his marking is in my life, shaping who I am even now.

Before sitting down to write these thoughts today, I had been reading various Psalms. All of this got me thinking about how God takes us residence in my life – about the God markings scripted around me, waiting for me to notice them, waiting for me to remember the proximity of God – not because I can physically see Him – but because, as Psalm 139 reminds me, his markings are all over my life, shaping who I am now. Even though I may have moments where I want to, Psalm 139 reminds me, I can’t escape the presence of God in my life.

Have you seen God’s markings today? He wants you to!

Today, my oldest daughter, Karena Grace, turns seven!! It amazes me how quickly time flies. It amazes me that I can still remember everything about my pregnancy, about the delivery, and about things that Karena has done over seven years.

In August of 2000, Ron and I moved from St. Catharines, Ontario back to the US, to Peoria, Illinois. After a week in Illinois, I was sick – not head cold sick – the kind of sick that has you begging for an end to come – the kind of sick that would last me way longer than I could ever imagine being sick. Of course, after years of infertility treatments and surgery, I thought what any normal person would think – “Yuck! I have the flu in August.” In October, after nearly eight weeks of being sick, some friends finally suggested a thought that had never crossed my mind – “Hey, maybe you are actually pregnant.” Sure enough, I was. Ron and I were excited to be parents, glad to have an answer to my out of control sickness, and thanking God for a miracle – a baby that many had written off.

May 17, 2001, Karena Grace, burst into our life – not just a miracle – a real blessing. Karena has taught us many things in seven years, we see ourselves differently – we have a totally different picture of what it means to be a child of God – a sense of awe and wonder for how God cares for his children has rocked our minds – we have been awakened to a greater appreciation for the arts – compassion and sensitivity has become a bigger part of our world. Being the first child, the first grandchild on both sides of our family, puts Karena – and all of us in a unique place. Ron and I are learning the art of parenting – and actually enjoying it, we’re not perfect parents, but we’re figuring it out. Our parents are enjoying the pleasures of “children you send home at the end of the day!”, and in a sense rediscovering the arts of genetics in a little life.

Karena, mommy and daddy love you! We love your always ready smile, we love your heart that extends itself from God to people everyday, we love your excitement for the simple things in life, we love to hear you create new songs of praise, we love to watch you express yourself in dance and artistic creations, we love to watch you catch caterpillars, frogs, and things moving.

KARENA, WE LOVE YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE YOU – CREATED IN LOVE – A TRUE MIRACLE OF GOD!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KARENA!!

This past month, Going All The Way: preparing for a marriage that goes the distance, finally made it off the shelf and into the “read me not” pile. Ron and I got this book as a gift and agreed to blog about it – then life went a little crazy. But, it made it off and was worth the read.

If you are looking to date, are dating, are thinking about marriage, or are in the midst of making wedding plans – I recommend you read this book. Also, if you work in pre-marital counseling or with young married couples – read this book.

Craig Groeschel, founder and pastor of LifeChurch.tv, doesn’t share research data or psychological principles for building strong marriages. Instead, his approach for fostering committed, long-lasting marriages comes through he real life experiences – full of messy relationships, and a journey that led him to meet his “One” – entering into a relationship with Jesus Christ. Through self study he learned the importance of developing a relationship with his “One” first, then working to find his “Two”.

This August, Ron and I will be married 13 years. Some of you are probably thinking, “this isn’t exactly the time to be reading a book preparing you for marriage.” Truthfully, it was refreshing to read this book – seeing in print many of the “habits” (chp.14), we have put into practice throughout our relationship, in print. It was also a great reminder that passion and pursuit doesn’t stop once you get married -passion and pursuit are a vital part of the marriage covenant that “goes all the way.”

Thanks to Craig Groeschel for writing this book from his life story – challenging us to live differently than what society calls “normal”

In October, when I started this blog, I thought it would be a great way to journal the incredible journey that our family had been called to walk. You know, a blog a day, that chronicles everything that happens, so that years from now we could all look back and marvel at what God was doing early on in our journey of faith – the journey of a church planting family. I thought it would be great to document our thoughts, our conversations, and God’s hand of providence in motion.Then I have woke up to the realization, I wasn’t doing a very good job of that. In fact, I really had not been faithful to the original good idea at all. I’m one of those – full speed, get the job done, make sure that everyone is fully taken care of – sit down and reflect once everyone else is settled, kind of people. My last three weeks, have continued to awaken me to the reality that life just doesn’t work that way. And so now, with two kids coughing up a lung, a pile of laundry, and floors that desperately need to be washed, I am reminiscing.

Reminiscing about how God has moved in our lives, how faithful God has been, and how in the midst of absolute craziness – life has yet to feel out of control. It must be the fact that 1 year ago, Ron and I completely surrendered control of our life journey to God’s design -fully committing to walk wherever God was taking us – even if it meant giving up the comforts we had grown accustomed to.

Here is a look back at the experiences that have defined our journey:

January ‘07

• Prayer, Prayer, Prayer – that God would help us discern the stirring He had been doing in our heart for several months

February ‘07

• Commit as a couple to walk wherever God was taking us
• Trusted friends begin praying for us in our discerning process
• Begin researching church planting

March ‘07

• Narrow down some paths to pursue in church planting

April ‘07

• Ron attends National New Church Conference
• Begin talking with church planters, church planting groups, and denominations

May ‘07

• More trusted friends commit to pray for us as we now begin seriously pursuing church planting

June ‘07

• Narrow the field to two organizations we would actively purse

July ‘07

• Sign up for assessment and look to partner with the Independent Christian Church and Stadia: New Church Strategies

August ‘07

• Attend Church Planting Assessment
• Affirmed as Church Planters

September ‘07

• Connect with the NOVA church plant network

October ‘07

• Affirmed as the new NOVA church planters
• Put our house on the market
• Ron resigns from Calvary Church

November ‘07

• Attend Church Planting Boot-camp
• Sell our house

December’07

• Pack our house, move out of our home, travel for Christmas
• Start fund-raising
• Ron finishes at Calvary Church

January ‘08

• Do the mid-west family, friends and Canada tour -
• Move to Northern Virginia – Let the fun begin

February ‘08

• Settle in, tour NOVA, battle sickness